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When girls don't put ***

Old Mar 2, 2008 | 03:50 PM
  #1  
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Default When girls don't put ***

When girls don't put out!!


This was written by a guy ... it's pretty damn smart.


Girls -- Please have a sense of humor! I have never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.' I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she says the words that every boyfriend on
the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.' She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.' We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a
pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that wench knows I'm smarter than her.
 
Old Mar 2, 2008 | 05:06 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

I love that one... I always read it start to finish each time too...
 
Old Mar 2, 2008 | 05:56 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

Must have been written by the guy that married my ex-wife.
 
Old Mar 2, 2008 | 06:05 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

 
Old Mar 2, 2008 | 11:03 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

BWAHAHHAHAHA
 
Old Mar 3, 2008 | 11:30 AM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

Now that was a good one. I don't think he is going to be getting any for a long time.
 
Old Mar 3, 2008 | 03:58 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

I'd kinda be scared to do that.... women are far to psycho.... especially when it deals with shopping...
 
Old Mar 3, 2008 | 05:10 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

goodone, Rhill.......did you even dare show this to your better half
 
Old Mar 3, 2008 | 10:00 PM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

actually she thought it was funny too
 
Old Mar 4, 2008 | 02:34 AM
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Default RE: When girls don't put ***

She's a KEEPER!!!
 

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