for the PA members
#1
03-03-2008, 09:40 AM
for the PA members
got this from my sister. could feel my neck getting more and more red with each sentence i read . . . (some times i miss home)
THE RULES OF RURAL PENNSYLVANIA ARE AS FOLLOWS:[/u][/b]
LISTEN UP CITY SLICKERS!!!! (AKA City-its)[/u][/b]
1. PULL YOUR DROOPY PANTS UP. YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT.[/b]
2. TURN YOUR CAP RIGHT, YOUR HEAD ISN'T CROOKED.[/b]
3. LET'S GET THIS STRAIGHT; IT'S CALLED A 'DIRT ROAD.' I DRIVE A PICKUP TRUCK BECAUSE I WANT TO. NO MATTER HOW SLOW YOU DRIVE, YOU'RE GOING TO GET DUST ON YOUR LEXUS. DRIVE IT OR GET OUT OF THE WAY.[/b]
4. THEY ARE CATTLE. THEY'RE LIVE STEAKS. THAT'S WHY THEY SMELL FUNNY TO YOU. BUT THEY SMELL LIKE MONEY TO US. GET OVER IT. DON'T LIKE IT? I-80 GOES EAST AND WEST, I-81 GOES NORTH AND SOUTH. PICK ONE.[/b]
5. SO YOU HAVE A $60,000 CAR. WE'RE IMPRESSED. WE HAVE $150,000 CORN PICKERS AND HAY BALERS THAT ARE DRIVEN ONLY 3 WEEKS A YEAR.[/b]
6. SO EVERY PERSON IN RURAL PENNSYLVANIA WAVES. WE THINK OF IT AS BEING FRIENDLY. TRY TO UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT.[/b]
7. IF THAT CELL PHONE RINGS WHILE AN 8-POINT BUCK AND 3 DOES ARE COMING IN, WE WILL SHOOT IT OUT OF YOUR HAND. YOU BETTER HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE IT UP TO YOUR EAR AT THE TIME.[/b]
8. YEAH, WE EAT TATERS & GRAVY, BEANS & CORNBREAD. WE FRY OUR FISH AFTER 'CATCHIN' 'EM'. YOU REALLY WANT SUSHI & CAVIAR? IT'S AVAILABLE AT THE CORNER BAIT SHOP.[/b]
9. THE 'OPENER' REFERS TO THE FIRST DAY OF DEER SEASON. IT'S A RELIGIOUS HOLIDAY HELD ON THE 15TH OF NOVEMBER.[/b]
10. WE OPEN DOORS FOR WOMEN. THAT IS APPLIED TO ALL WOMEN,[/u] REGARDLESS OF AGE.[/b]
11. NO, THERE'S NO 'VEGETARIAN SPECIAL' ON THE MENU. ORDER STEAK. OR YOU CAN ORDER THE CHEF'S SALAD AND PICK OFF THE 2 POUNDS OF HAM & TURKEY.[/b]
12. WHEN WE FILL OUT A TABLE, THERE ARE THREE MAIN DISHES: MEATS (INCLUDES FISH), VEGETABLES, AND BREADS. WE USE FOUR SPICES: SALT, PEPPER, HOT SAUCE AND KETCHUP. OH, YEAH... WE DON'T CARE WHAT YOU FOLKS IN JERSEY CALL THAT STUFF YOU EAT... IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!!!![/b]
13. YOU BRING 'COKE' INTO MY HOUSE, IT BETTER BE BROWN, WET AND SERVED OVER ICE.[/b]
14. YOU BRING 'MARY JANE' INTO MY HOUSE, SHE BETTER BE CUTE, KNOW HOW TO SHOOT, DRIVE A TRUCK, AND HAVE LONG HAIR.[/b]
15. COLLEGE AND HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL IS AS IMPORTANT HERE AS THE EAGLES AND THE SIXERS, AND A DANG SITE MORE FUN TO WATCH.[/b]
16. YEAH, WE HAVE GOLF COURSES. BUT DON'T HIT THE WATER HAZARDS---IT SPOOKS THE FISH.[/b]
17. COLLEGES? WE HAVE THEM ALL OVER. WE HAVE STATE UNIVERSITIES, COMMUNITY COLLEGES, AND VO-TECHS. THEY COME OUTTA THERE WITH AN EDUCATION PLUS A LOVE FOR GOD AND COUNTRY, AND THEY STILL WAVE AT EVERYBODY WHEN THEY COME FOR THE HOLIDAYS.[/b]
18. WE HAVE A WHOLE TON OF FOLKS IN THE ARMY, NAVY, AIR FORCE, MARINES, & NATIONAL GUARD. AND ARE BIKERS ARE PATRIOTS AS WELL. SO DON'T MESS WITH US. IF YOU DO, YOU WILL GET WHIPPED BY THE BEST.[/b]
19. TURN DOWN THAT BLASTED CAR STEREO! THAT THUMPITY-THUMP CRAP AIN'T MUSIC, ANYWAY. WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT ANYMORE THAN WE WANT TO SEE YOUR BOXERS. (Besides, your going to rattle the paint off that foreign piece of cheap japanese steel!) REFER BACK TO #1.[/b]
20. 4 INCHES ISN'T A BLIZZARD - IT'S A FLURRY, SLOW DOWN, KEEP A DISTANCE FROM THE CAR AHEAD AND DO NOT STOMP ON YOUR BRAKES. DRIVE LIKE YOU GOT SOME SENSE IN IT, AND DON'T TAKE ALL OUR BREAD, MILK, AND TOILET PAPER FROM THE GROCERY STORES. THIS AIN'T ALASKA, WORST CASE YOU MAY HAVE TO LIVE A WHOLE DAY WITHOUT CROISSANTS. THE PICKUPS WITH SNO
THE RULES OF RURAL PENNSYLVANIA ARE AS FOLLOWS:[/u][/b]
LISTEN UP CITY SLICKERS!!!! (AKA City-its)[/u][/b]
1. PULL YOUR DROOPY PANTS UP. YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT.[/b]
2. TURN YOUR CAP RIGHT, YOUR HEAD ISN'T CROOKED.[/b]
3. LET'S GET THIS STRAIGHT; IT'S CALLED A 'DIRT ROAD.' I DRIVE A PICKUP TRUCK BECAUSE I WANT TO. NO MATTER HOW SLOW YOU DRIVE, YOU'RE GOING TO GET DUST ON YOUR LEXUS. DRIVE IT OR GET OUT OF THE WAY.[/b]
4. THEY ARE CATTLE. THEY'RE LIVE STEAKS. THAT'S WHY THEY SMELL FUNNY TO YOU. BUT THEY SMELL LIKE MONEY TO US. GET OVER IT. DON'T LIKE IT? I-80 GOES EAST AND WEST, I-81 GOES NORTH AND SOUTH. PICK ONE.[/b]
5. SO YOU HAVE A $60,000 CAR. WE'RE IMPRESSED. WE HAVE $150,000 CORN PICKERS AND HAY BALERS THAT ARE DRIVEN ONLY 3 WEEKS A YEAR.[/b]
6. SO EVERY PERSON IN RURAL PENNSYLVANIA WAVES. WE THINK OF IT AS BEING FRIENDLY. TRY TO UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT.[/b]
7. IF THAT CELL PHONE RINGS WHILE AN 8-POINT BUCK AND 3 DOES ARE COMING IN, WE WILL SHOOT IT OUT OF YOUR HAND. YOU BETTER HOPE YOU DON'T HAVE IT UP TO YOUR EAR AT THE TIME.[/b]
8. YEAH, WE EAT TATERS & GRAVY, BEANS & CORNBREAD. WE FRY OUR FISH AFTER 'CATCHIN' 'EM'. YOU REALLY WANT SUSHI & CAVIAR? IT'S AVAILABLE AT THE CORNER BAIT SHOP.[/b]
9. THE 'OPENER' REFERS TO THE FIRST DAY OF DEER SEASON. IT'S A RELIGIOUS HOLIDAY HELD ON THE 15TH OF NOVEMBER.[/b]
10. WE OPEN DOORS FOR WOMEN. THAT IS APPLIED TO ALL WOMEN,[/u] REGARDLESS OF AGE.[/b]
11. NO, THERE'S NO 'VEGETARIAN SPECIAL' ON THE MENU. ORDER STEAK. OR YOU CAN ORDER THE CHEF'S SALAD AND PICK OFF THE 2 POUNDS OF HAM & TURKEY.[/b]
12. WHEN WE FILL OUT A TABLE, THERE ARE THREE MAIN DISHES: MEATS (INCLUDES FISH), VEGETABLES, AND BREADS. WE USE FOUR SPICES: SALT, PEPPER, HOT SAUCE AND KETCHUP. OH, YEAH... WE DON'T CARE WHAT YOU FOLKS IN JERSEY CALL THAT STUFF YOU EAT... IT AIN'T REAL CHILI!!!![/b]
13. YOU BRING 'COKE' INTO MY HOUSE, IT BETTER BE BROWN, WET AND SERVED OVER ICE.[/b]
14. YOU BRING 'MARY JANE' INTO MY HOUSE, SHE BETTER BE CUTE, KNOW HOW TO SHOOT, DRIVE A TRUCK, AND HAVE LONG HAIR.[/b]
15. COLLEGE AND HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL IS AS IMPORTANT HERE AS THE EAGLES AND THE SIXERS, AND A DANG SITE MORE FUN TO WATCH.[/b]
16. YEAH, WE HAVE GOLF COURSES. BUT DON'T HIT THE WATER HAZARDS---IT SPOOKS THE FISH.[/b]
17. COLLEGES? WE HAVE THEM ALL OVER. WE HAVE STATE UNIVERSITIES, COMMUNITY COLLEGES, AND VO-TECHS. THEY COME OUTTA THERE WITH AN EDUCATION PLUS A LOVE FOR GOD AND COUNTRY, AND THEY STILL WAVE AT EVERYBODY WHEN THEY COME FOR THE HOLIDAYS.[/b]
18. WE HAVE A WHOLE TON OF FOLKS IN THE ARMY, NAVY, AIR FORCE, MARINES, & NATIONAL GUARD. AND ARE BIKERS ARE PATRIOTS AS WELL. SO DON'T MESS WITH US. IF YOU DO, YOU WILL GET WHIPPED BY THE BEST.[/b]
19. TURN DOWN THAT BLASTED CAR STEREO! THAT THUMPITY-THUMP CRAP AIN'T MUSIC, ANYWAY. WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT ANYMORE THAN WE WANT TO SEE YOUR BOXERS. (Besides, your going to rattle the paint off that foreign piece of cheap japanese steel!) REFER BACK TO #1.[/b]
20. 4 INCHES ISN'T A BLIZZARD - IT'S A FLURRY, SLOW DOWN, KEEP A DISTANCE FROM THE CAR AHEAD AND DO NOT STOMP ON YOUR BRAKES. DRIVE LIKE YOU GOT SOME SENSE IN IT, AND DON'T TAKE ALL OUR BREAD, MILK, AND TOILET PAPER FROM THE GROCERY STORES. THIS AIN'T ALASKA, WORST CASE YOU MAY HAVE TO LIVE A WHOLE DAY WITHOUT CROISSANTS. THE PICKUPS WITH SNO
#2
03-03-2008, 09:43 AM
RE: for the PA members
AMEN!!! Any state that has openeing day of buck season as a holiday is ok with me 
Gotta love when the entire state shuts down to go kill deer....God I miss PA. 
Gotta love when the entire state shuts down to go kill deer....God I miss PA.
#3
03-03-2008, 10:02 AM
RE: for the PA members
I have seen this written as from any number of states. Sad part is only those of us from those types of places will get it. I am proud to be a redneck. Thanks for sharing this and who knows maybe one or two converts will come out od this.
#6
03-03-2008, 10:27 AM
RE: for the PA members
only been pheasant hunting so far in CA. and that was at a club in Corning. farm raised are the dumbest fakkin' birds i've ever come across - almost have to kick them to get them off the ground. freakin' dog even got one . . . . . . [>:]
#7
03-03-2008, 10:37 AM
RE: for the PA members
Got a place in the mountains SE of Bakersfield I go for quail. Up until last season the hunting was fantastic. With the drought we didn't get much of a hatch last year and the birds were pretty scarce. Hopefully with the rain we'll have more birds this year. Pretty rustic, 3 cabins, one with a wood stove and a FP. The others just keep the wind and rain off of you.There is a water well and an outhouse so the basics are covered. Pretty rough, mountainous terrain but my kind of hunting. At night in front of the fireplace the scotch never tasted so good anywhere else. If you are into quail/chukker ( chukkaronly sometimes ) and there are birds this season we'll try to work in a hunt if you can get away.
#8
03-03-2008, 10:51 AM
RE: for the PA members
sounds like the cabins we used for deer hunting when i lived in PA. i'll bring the beer cans to cook the chukkars in . . . . .(only good thing you can do with any beer that comes in a can [&o])
