Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling and his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp.

"What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender. "Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy. "That little ****, O'Conner," says Sean, "He couldn't do that to you. He must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had and a terrible lickin' he gave me with it."

"Well," says Sean, "you should have defended yourself. Didn't you have something in your hand?"

"That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner's breast and a thing of beauty it was!"

 

Happy St. Patt's day to you too...

 

eye..Happy shamrock day to ya me matey...I have a wee bit of the Blarney in me meself..